My name is Lolita and I'm a sexaholic. My sexual sobriety is...three days.
It was suppose to be one month. I had been so excited to get that one month chip. But I blew it. I couldn't wait two minutes for Kay to get back from the bathroom. And I masturbated. Throwing away a month of sobriety.
I was looking forward to talking at the meeting tonight. I had a lot I wanted to share and needed to get off my chest. But, there was a new person at the meeting tonight. When a new person comes, the format of the meeting changes. There wasn't enough time for me to talk.
I almost started crying at the end of the meeting.
I ended up staying after and talking to one of the group leaders. I talked to him a bit about what I've been going through lately. I got the name and number of a lady to call about being my sponsor. Now I just have to find the courage and motivation to call.
I also need to find the courage and motivation to call my psychiatrist's office tomorrow and schedule an appointment for a medication increase. I'm still struggling with my bipolar disorder. I'm no longer hypomanic. Now I'm having crying spells.
I seem to be missing the motivation lately.
